Sunday, December 21, 2008

Wait, this isn't normal?

To add to Mike's post and give you a sample of a typical conversation, here is a discussion we had regarding the Visanthe Shiancoe incident and lockerroom nudity:

E: I don't know why this is such a big deal. Men prance around naked all the time.
M: You've got it right there: girls don't find nudity in the locker room a big deal. Guys do. In my experiences in several different gym settings, I've found that the male neck is physically incapable of turning down more than three degrees once it senses that there is an uncovered wiener in the area. It's eyes up, face-forward at all times. I'm not sure if the same goes for all males, but my peripheral vision is actually disabled when another naked man is within a five-foot radius of me. I can't even imagine being a reporter on my first day in an NFL locker room. You could whip a softball off of my temple and I'd have no idea it was coming.
E: One of the articles said there's a female reporter who's all business, all the time. The guys would try to rile her up by doing stuff like rubbing lotion on their nuts while talking to her but she wouldn't even blink. Whereas with a male reporter in a women's locker room, all it'd take is boobs.
M: Boobs? I think if someone were high-beaming through a sports bra it would be chaos.
E: One player said that he showing off on purpose. So maybe it's the cameraman's fault.
M: Someone on Dan Patrick suggested that he was doing it as a shout out to his wife. "Hey honey, just wanted to let you know I'm thinking about you. Here's my dong."
E: There's a man I could marry.
M: Some women like flowers. Others like diamonds. The rest just want to see their husband's horse cock on national television.

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